Handbasket to Hell

Hi,

Well, we’ve been hearing all sorts of doom and gloom on the radio lately. Three very up-beat news items that are getting a lot of air play, and which soothingly stir us from our slumber every morning, are: The Pickton trial, global warming and the impending earthquake disaster that’s about to hit Vancouver.

So, in order to get a sense of how serious the earthquake situation could be, I went online to the Natural Resources Canada website to see how much we’re at risk in our little apartment, and the conclusion is… I have no idea, but it looks BAD.

How bad you ask? Well, take a look for yourself.

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I don’t think that box labeled “WARNING” and highlighted in yellow with red writing is telling me to get a nice Chardonnay for our picnic basket, and don my favourite gingham dress and polish Neil’s Birkenstocks for care-free cavorting in La La Land. Nope, I think it’s telling me to climb into that handbasket and hang on – we’re goin’ to Hell!

Of course, we live in Vancouver, which lies on a fault-line. Earthquakes are a part of geologic history, so it’s a no-brainer that the “Big One” will hit someday. Here’s a pretty picture of Canada’s Earthquake zones over the past month, (source: Natural Resources Canada http://earthquakescanada.nrcan.gc.ca/index_e.php):

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Notice Saskatchewan is earthquake free. I foresee property values going up in Saskatchewan. Saskatchewan is a very symmetrical place: It is rectangular, flat and you can always see a lot of sky. It is symmetrical in temperature too, summers are very hot and winters are very cold. And there are no earthquakes. I think they’re burying nuclear waste in Saskatchewan.

But have no fear, Gentle Reader, you can now breathe a sigh of relief. As of 2 hours ago, the earthquake risk has been lowered. Whew. Neil is working in Seattle this weekend, and I was afraid he might not be able to come home, how could he land if the tarmak at YVR was either under water or mangled from the quake? And I couldn’t figure out how I’d get over to Mom to save her, and then up to Dad to save him, and then over to Neil’s parents who live on the opposite side of Vancouver from my parents, but I doubt they’d need saving, they’ve got the duck punt to float around in their house which would be underwater because they live on the delta, and then I’d have to make sure our cat was okay and safe and all the while Neil would be circling above Quake Desimated Vancouver in a plane that was unable to land, and we don’t have any bottled water and an earthquake preparedness kit. Oh the anxiety!

The upshot would be that I’d have a really good excuse not to do my homework.

Speaking of which…

Thanks for reading.

Ingrid
Out of the Puddle and spinning the Hamster Wheel